The wisest of women builds her house, but folly with her own hands tears it down. Proverbs 14:1
I read this verse about a month ago, and it was so convicting to me that I haven't been able to forget it. Every day since then, it has been going on in my head, a true convicting of the Spirit.
I have a sincere desire to build my house - to build up our home and family. And I, like many other wives and mothers, spend so much of my time and energy investing in my family. I take care of my home in an attempt to make it an inviting place for us. I spend time with my kids, attending to their needs. I feed my family, planning and cooking food that they (mostly) enjoy and is (mostly) nutritious and keeps us in good health. I love our kids and tell them often and give lots of physical affection. I seek to help them grow and develop, and I discipline them. I take interest in their interests and give them ways to explore them. I notice their weaknesses and give encouragement, patience, and grace. I listen to my husband, his concerns and triumphs, and support him in his work. I am an encourager to him, a source of love, and a partner in parenting.
There are so many ways I can and do build up my house! But after all this building, I too often use my own hands to tear it all apart. A harsh word leaves little thought to love and affection. Laziness breeds selfishness. Lack of discipline leaves our kids feeling unstructured and insecure. Fighting with my husband leaves dissension that affects not only us but our kids also. Failure to encourage him leaves him stressed and unable to truly enjoy being with me. And its so easy for me to blame others for the destruction in our family - when I ought to spend more time protecting and defending what I have been busy building.
This imagery has been so powerful to me. Every decision I make either builds up a strong wall or knocks it down. And I have started asking myself - before I pick a fight with my husband or respond in anger to my kids - is this going to build my house? Or am I just tearing down what I built earlier? There is nothing more foolish than a builder tearing down her own handiwork.
I'm praying lately that God would give me the strength and wisdom to build. What decisions have you been making lately that are tearing down your house?
1 comment:
Very true, and we all do this out of frustration from time to time. I am finding that the level of patience I MUST have for my husband right now highlights the level of patience I DID NOT have at times before his illness, although I didn't recognize it then. Thankfully, my husband forgives me and God forgives me for those times.
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